The Secret Wardrobe heart keys.

These keys fit but you don't really need them if you feel like taking a look inside the wardrobe.

And it's not at all like in the movie where the little girl goes in and steps out on a whole different world full of witches, bad spirits and snow.

Here, the doors slide and you find yourself facing a man made crypt that fits only people the size of your hand. If you push your whole arm inside the crypt, your fingers will soon touch a hairy ground. You'll straight away think it feels disgusting but that's only coz you won't be able to see the little place at all. Think of the hairy part as a patch of greenish fake grass. Work your fingers round the space until you find some kind of toy. You'll know it's a toy because it will have wheels and it will be made of plastic.

Pull it out carefully and dust it. If you haven't grown too old, try playing with it. If you can't figure out how to play with it, ask someone younger than you for directions of use. Don't phrase it this way though - ''Directions of use''. Phrase it differently, something like "Can you show me how to play with this toy?'' This way you won't scare kids off and they'll think you are their age, just a bit heavier and bigger in size, something like a giant human.

After you play with it for a while, sit down and take a breath. Did you have fun?

If you decide you had fun, go back to the wardrobe, put your arm through the crypt and repeat what you did before.

What's your next toy gonna be like, I wonder?